I had to line up for over an hour yesterday to get tickets to Spiderman 3. Of course, there were naysayers predicting that I won’t be able to get the tickets for the second day of screening (I had to forgo an earlier advance screening because I was too caught up with something else - but you can read Swifty’s review on the same one.). But I got it, and I did enjoy Spidey 3; with a price of course - I had to beat the crowd.

And here are the guides to beating the crowd:

1. Loudly discuss with your friend on the phone that Spiderman 3 is a lousy movie (despite not watching it yet), and loudly proclaim its not worth to buy a ticket.
2. Jostle your way through the crazy crowd. Show your fist when necessary.
3. Fart - eat lots of broccoli before lining up for the tickets.
4. Where there are kids and parents around, loudly wonder to a friend why Spiderman 3 is not a R-rated movie (18+ in Malaysia) - because it has [non existant] sex scenes and the movie’s ultra violent nature.
5. The “Hey look! What’s that!” trick works - but only use it once. Never use it more than once.
6. People waiting in line have a tendency of having a) short memories and; b)short attention span. Use this as an advantage to slip ahead of people.
7. Discourage people from watching the movie (”What, you mean to tell me you’re going to watch that lame Spiderman 3? I watched it last night - horrible. Why not watch the uber cool uber funny Jim Carrey in The Number 23 instead? No? You’re a looooooser“)
8. Intentionally step on people’s feet. Girls wearing open sandals are good targets - they drop out of line very easily.
9. Threaten the patrons (”If you don’t sell me your tickets, I’ll…“)
10. Scare the kids away - its a two for one: The parents drop out of line, and there won’t be kids making silly woowoo noises in the cinema.

I did: 1, 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, 8, 10 last night. 5 didn’t work on me, but did on another occasion (Star Wars), and I’m not so foolhardy to try 9. Can’t say I’m proud - but it did work, and I did get waaaaay ahead in line. (Yes, despite that, I still spent about an hour in the cinema getting the tickets). No, I’m not a brute. Brutes are those people who push you all the way and curse and scream when they don’t get the tickets. And they don’t blog. Brutes don’t comment either.

Ah. I enjoyed the show - especially after the hard work I had to put through getting the tickets.

Cool? DiggDel.icio.usTechnoratiFeedsterFurl
RSS feed for comments on this post  |  TrackBack URI for this post