On the Lot Episode 5

Right. I didn’t review Episode 3 and 4, because I never expected the American Idol style of the reality show (They seem to be changing format every week!). Now that I’ve recovered from that reeling, I felt Carolina Zorrilla de San Martin shouldn’t be kicked out (there is never a justification to kick out someone pretty), and Phil Hawkin’s Please Hold was not bad either. IMO, Hillary Graham and Kenny Luby should go.

But since they didn’t go, well then. Let’s proceed on to this week’s On the Lot. The remaining 15 contestants were given 5 days to shoot a 3 minute short. And they will be split into groups of 5, which will compete amongst themselves. This week’s group consists of Trever James, Hillary Graham, Adam Stein, Sam Friedlander and Shalini Kantayya. Okay, let’s skip on to the review of their shows, mmkay?

• Laughing Out Loud – A Comic Journey (Shalini Kantayya)
  Okay, so this is supposed to be a documentary about a gay Indian comedian. I guess, it’s because of Shalini’s own heritage and experience as a documentary maker, she makes a documentary. It seemed disconnected to me, and there wasn’t any story to tell. But I have to agree with Michael Bay – I liked the visuals. But visuals alone doesn’t sell a movie.
  4/10
• The First Time I Met the Finklesteins (Hillary Graham)
  This show cements my opinion that Hillary should have been gone last week. Somehow, to me, the entire thing looked like a video shot on a home camera. And the story is old, and redone (Hello, Ben Stiller in Meet the Parents?). The jokes… maybe I’m not American (and don’t dig American humor, I prefer British)… I don’t find them too funny. I don’t agree with Brendon (then again, he’s a heavy critic), who thinks that the tight shots are a good way to tell a story – I prefer wider shots meself
  3/10
• Teri (Trever James)
  This is what happens when a filmmaker lets his imagination go wild. It’s about Ben, a guy who is anxious over meeting his blind date (and Trever must be a real country boy to spell .com as .kom, but maybe it’s done on purpose). And so his imagination runs wild over who he meets. Nothing too spectacular, but better than Finklesteins.
  5/10
• Broken Pipe Dreams (Sam Friedlander)
  Sam, whose Replication Theory I liked a lot, seem to fall short this time. His shots are somewhat nice, but uh… I don’t really dig flicks about guys chasing what they flushed down the toilet. And what was with the red wire-blue wire thing? A bomb diffusion parody? Didn’t work well. But the shots were good. Story wasn’t too good.
  5/10
• Dough: The Musical (Adam Stein)
  This week’s impresser is Adam Stein. I loved the musical a lot. And add to the fact that he did it in 5 days – I must say, it was extreme great effort. I found it to be very well made, but he could add more visual creativity with his shots (like a overhead in the bakery during the song and dance sequence).
  8/10

Of course, here are the transcribed lyrics to Dough: The Musical (oh yes, I have that much free time) -

My dad and my grandpa, Fred one and Fred two,
told me, Fred the Third, how to find love that’s true

They each wooed a girl with fresh bakery bread
One crumb on the lips and they had wives to wed

I’m a poor Southern girl, applying for jobs,
Been chewed up by sharks and been hit on by slobs

My rent’s overdue, and my car’s repossessed
Let me meet an employer, let him be impressed

When will this miracle happen for me
I know in my heart that it’s all meant to be

I’ll dress for success, I can make it
Love is so close I can taste it

In old Chattanooga, my forefathers pray,
this bread that I bake will bring love here today

Here it is, Linda, your moment of truth
I can serve up a pastry, or wipe down a booth

I’m far from a moron, and hardly an oaf,
I have a feeling this bread, will be my true loaf/love

Fix up your hair, make your busom look ample
It’s time to go public with this morning’s free sample!

A feminine patron! Of marrying age!
A friendly young baker who might pay a wage!

Excuse me sir/miss!

That sign says you’re hiring. I have my CV
Please try my fresh bread – it’s totally free!

No thanks, I don’t eat carbs

What a disaster! I’m filled with dismay
Hey Mister, won’t you look at a girl’s resume?

Sure, let’s have a look-see
Wait! Are you from Chattanooga, Tennessee?

Are you little Fred, from Fred and Fred Jr’s Down Home World Famous Raisin Bread Bakery?

Your house and my house, were two blocks apart
Would I get health coverage, right from the start

I’ll bake you a cake with no carbohydrates today
Will federal and state taxes be deducted from my pay!?

I can’t believe, this is happening to me!
I know she’s my wife to-be
I know soon I’ll be debt free!

The lyrics in blue are Fred’s lines, while the lyrics in pink are Linda’s lines. Black indicates that it was sung together.

Meanwhile, can you believe that Carolina is 36?