I take a bus to the shopping mall (that’s sad, considering back home, the nearest shopping mall was a walking distance from my house).

On the bus today, there was nobody, save me and the driver. The driver was a friendly chap, and we soon chatted a storm up. Usually I don’t like to talk to strangers, but this guy infused me with his enthusiasm. He was a part time driver, and was a fire-marshall on race courses. He was really animated, even down to the extent of mimicking walkie-talkie sounds and codes (like: 401 fire in progress chhhhrrrrr.. blabla). That guy really loved his motorsport, to actually want a piece of action in the racing field.

He told me a lot of interesting things, like how, over the course of 15 years being the fire marshall at places like Bathurst 1000 and the V8 Super Cars, he had encountered 4 deaths (i.e. people he failed to rescue), and all the amazing miracle stories. Then he started bragging about his power tools (what is it with Aussies and their power tools??). Fun guy, that man.

Then I went shopping.

I like my solitude when I’m shopping alone. It gives me focus. Focus to consider a lot of things. I sat down and watched people, reconsidering them. Ivan, if you’re reading this, it means that you gave a powerful argument. I re-evaluated my stance on things, as I watched the humans pass by me, in happiness, in sadness, in compassion and in cruelty.

After a long fruitful thought (actually about 2 hours sitting on that bench), I’ve come to my conclusion. I still stand by what I’ve always believed -人之初，性本善. I do not believe humans are inherently evil, nor are they inherently sinful. At worst, it’s Tabula Rasa. I’ve evaluated many things as I sat there in the bench. And to this conclusion, I have come to.

I wonder what will the real Namco think of this (try to spot 7,6,5 in the picture, bonus if you can spot a PacMan, or if you can tell me which shop I’m in)

I like my solitude when shopping alone. It gives me focus. Focus to consider solitude and alone-ness. I am alone, but not lonely. There are many people around me, but I am alone. Many people fear being alone, because they fear facing themselves. Confront yourself, and you’re ready to confront the world.

After a long fruitful thought (actually about 2 hours sitting on that bench), I’ve come to my conclusion. I’m at peace with myself.

Then I went home. On a bus.

On the bus home today, it was pretty empty - only 4 people including me and the driver. I sat down and I started humming Still Alive by Ellen Mclain from Portal. Then I started mouthing the words, and started singing. After a while, a tap on my shoulder. And I turned.

The guy behind me sounded like Yahtzee (but I’m pretty sure it’s not him. I think I can spot a Bail Organa lookalike from miles, being the Star Wars fan I am. Then again, I suck at facial recognition. Plus, he doesn’t wear a hat.). He told me,

“Yes, we know you played Portal and beat GLaDOS, Well Done! Now please shut up! It’s irritating!”

I shut up. And went home.

p/s: As I type this, I can’t help but to wonder if that’s really Yahtzee. The lack of a hat says something (it’s like seeing Terry Pratchett without a hat). Or maybe Yahtzee was on the bus from Carindale to the City. Then again, he didn’t call me a cheseburger snorting Yank (not that I’m American). Hmm..

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